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Tomlinson’s Deli - coming soon August 2024

TorqueWheeler

An enormous amount of muscle.
Forum Clout
76,265
This really is fucking funny. I hope we'll see future additions to the menu like...

IMG-3147.jpg


...this Thanksgiving special.

EU4addf-X0-AIC1s-M.jpg

EWFWvqe-VAAEWO95.jpg

EVHoc-FQXYAAjztu.jpg

EVvkh24-XQAILR3-A.jpg

EXX-Ph-LUMAEgv-Z.jpg

EWPpk-Mh-Xs-AAr-Pp1.jpg

EXb2-HRTWAAIGey-J.jpg


A variety of chicken and Asian dishes (Lightsaber chopsticks are a must.)

EXxe-Jv7-XQAQWT6a.jpg


This curry (?) plated by someone with severe autism...

EHlh-Vh9-X0-AArr4g.jpg


...and whatever the fuck kind of slop is going on here.

Can we add a drinks menu?

(Not) Miller Lite
Tap water
Need to source that whisky they age in barrels at sea too.
 

iBangedQuasi

Universally Hated
Forum Clout
23,339
This really is fucking funny. I hope we'll see future additions to the menu like...

IMG-3147.jpg


...this Thanksgiving special.

EU4addf-X0-AIC1s-M.jpg

EWFWvqe-VAAEWO95.jpg

EVHoc-FQXYAAjztu.jpg

EVvkh24-XQAILR3-A.jpg

EXX-Ph-LUMAEgv-Z.jpg

EWPpk-Mh-Xs-AAr-Pp1.jpg

EXb2-HRTWAAIGey-J.jpg


A variety of chicken and Asian dishes (Lightsaber chopsticks are a must.)

EXxe-Jv7-XQAQWT6a.jpg


This curry (?) plated by someone with severe autism...

EHlh-Vh9-X0-AArr4g.jpg


...and whatever the fuck kind of slop is going on here.


Need to source that whisky they age in barrels at sea too.
Light saber chopsticks. You have to motherfawkin me right now. What a fucking FAG.
 

AliceWorquer

Fat bitch with faggot tits
Forum Clout
18,272
It's got to fucking sting knowing that your atalkers are vastly more creative than you are. Patrick has never made anything with even half the depth of this. There is more worldbuilding, characterization and humor in one fake diner menu than there is in 6 novels and 1/4 million tweets worth of Patrick's writing.
The well-done Wellington is rib destroying.
 

Torque’sHeadBump

(Voluntarily) torqued boomer
Forum Clout
63,579
Don't forget that shitty ass apple pie he made where people told him not to use a certain apple or it was going to turn out bad and dipshit Pat was like "NuH-uH, I'M gOnNa dO iT My WaY!" and the pie came out looking like shit and Pat made some lying ass post about how great it was.
The Red Delicious Apple Pie.
 

AliceWorquer

Fat bitch with faggot tits
Forum Clout
18,272
I'll never not laugh at the burnt beef wellington. It's possibly the most delicious thing the human species has ever invented and he found a way not just to make it look disgusting, but he actually flexed the image as an unironic brag on social media on two different platforms. At 40 years old.

It kills me bc you know he was sorta looking forward to eating it all day but was really looking forward to the dopamine hit from the sweet twitter pic.

Then he fucked it all up, probably drunk and forgot it was in the oven, was invariably crushed but didn't have it in him to let the opportunity pass. I bet he paced back and fourth for 20 minutes debating whether or not to post the pic and finally got drunk enough to say "fuck it."
The best part about the wellington is that it only came out like that because he refused to cook anything that wasn't well done and ignored the recipe.
 

iBangedQuasi

Universally Hated
Forum Clout
23,339

WifeStoreWill

The WifeStore called, they’re running out of gooks
Forum Clout
32,857
This really is fucking funny. I hope we'll see future additions to the menu like...

IMG-3147.jpg


...this Thanksgiving special.

EU4addf-X0-AIC1s-M.jpg

EWFWvqe-VAAEWO95.jpg

EVHoc-FQXYAAjztu.jpg

EVvkh24-XQAILR3-A.jpg

EXX-Ph-LUMAEgv-Z.jpg

EWPpk-Mh-Xs-AAr-Pp1.jpg

EXb2-HRTWAAIGey-J.jpg


A variety of chicken and Asian dishes (Lightsaber chopsticks are a must.)

EXxe-Jv7-XQAQWT6a.jpg


This curry (?) plated by someone with severe autism...

EHlh-Vh9-X0-AArr4g.jpg


...and whatever the fuck kind of slop is going on here.


Need to source that whisky they age in barrels at sea too.
Wow, they have so little (Formica) counter or drawer space that they keep the cooking tools ON the stove. Poor.
 

fuckwit

Fat
Forum Clout
1,357
I can't find that particular exchange but he definitely said he was changing the recipe because he doesn't like rare beef. @Caverlock you got it in your autism archives? I can only find these other things that show what a culinary retard he is.View attachment 194632View attachment 194633
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View attachment 194635
The idea of this cunt getting a well-done filet mignon infuriates me. What the fuck is even the point? May as well eat a fucking hunk of leather, you absolute fucking imbecile. Goddammit... the shit about rare meat not agreeing with his palate enrages me, coupled with the general attitude of "everyone else is wrong except for me, because I am a big brained boy who is always right." This fucker thinks he is cultured. He is the trashiest most beige fuck there is.
 
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