Tomlinson’s Deli - coming soon August 2024

Uncle J’s Sink Emporium

You gotta pump those sink numbers up, funster.
I can't find that particular exchange but he definitely said he was changing the recipe because he doesn't like rare beef. @Caverlock you got it in your autism archives? I can only find these other things that show what a culinary retard he is.View attachment 194632View attachment 194633
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Wow, little known Steakhouse Morton’s of Chicago. And a well done filet. He should have been physically removed from the premises for ordering something like that. Shocking that he got cucked by that very wife. Imagine the couple that they were with roaring with laughter in the car on the way home talking about the whole experience with those two dopey rubes.

*if this story even happened at all and wasn’t something he made up because he thought it sounded cool.

And fuck his horrible, wordy writing style. Cut that entire thing in half, fatso. This isn’t a high school English assignment with a word count minimum.
 
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And fuck his horrible, wordy writing style. Cut that entire thing in half, fatso. This isn’t a high school English assignment with a word count minimum.
Seriously, he can't even tell a story that supposedly happened to him well. Irrelevant backstory, meandering, pointless details. The place isn't even mentioned until the second paragraph. I hope an arab cuts his fingers off before he commits more crimes against the written word. That's gotta be at least 40 pounds he would lose too!
 
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AliceWorquer

Fat bitch with faggot tits
He is such a fascinating human being.

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He doesn't like pate and didn't even mention duxelles so it makes me wonder what he even thinks he's supposed to be making.
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This is some of the closest evidence I can find of him admitting he fucked up ever. He clearly made up his own temperature and cooking times because cooking is easy and he's a special boy who doesn't believe in rare meat but he still wants a pat on the back because he made something that is considered to be a benchmark of high skill so he posted that abomination to the internet and either couldn't see, or just tried to pretend he didnt massively fuck it up. He wants people to think he has the skills and insights to be a cultured renaissance man who is also a creative maverick but he has no real idea what any of those skills are supposed to represent and it is fucking insane how badly that fucks over his credibility. Just incomprehensible self sabotage. He made an objectively bad wellington that looks like objectively bad food in general and he still posted it on twitter claiming it was "very, very good", "delicious" even, because he cant even comprehend the depths of his own ignorance. There is no way on gods earth that was "delicious". I don't give a fuck how subjective you think taste is. Edible is probably the kindest description anyone could give it. Even if by some fluke the beef wasnt completely ruined I can taste the bitterness of the burnt pastry just looking at a photo of it and chopped almonds are an incomprehensible addition. The sheer lack of objectivity, and humility and self-reflection from him every single time is mind-boggling.
 

DougOutDoug

OA Army General
He made an objectively bad wellington that looks like objectively bad food in general and he still posted it on twitter claiming it was "very, very good", "delicious" even, because he cant even comprehend the depths of his own ignorance.

It's so astoundingly awful. I've got middling cooking skills and no patience but I've made it twice, following a Gordon Ramsey video on YouTube. While it didn't look exactly as glorious as his it turned out pretty well and looked and I imagine tasted 100 times better than that offensive piece of shit Rick made and for some reason posted for everyone to see.
 

Josef Kuminski

кормить бабушку
He is such a fascinating human being.

View attachment 194639
He doesn't like pate and didn't even mention duxelles so it makes me wonder what he even thinks he's supposed to be making.
View attachment 194638
This is some of the closest evidence I can find of him admitting he fucked up ever. He clearly made up his own temperature and cooking times because cooking is easy and he's a special boy who doesn't believe in rare meat but he still wants a pat on the back because he made something that is considered to be a benchmark of high skill so he posted that abomination to the internet and either couldn't see, or just tried to pretend he didnt massively fuck it up. He wants people to think he has the skills and insights to be a cultured renaissance man who is also a creative maverick but he has no real idea what any of those skills are supposed to represent and it is fucking insane how badly that fucks over his credibility. Just incomprehensible self sabotage. He made an objectively bad wellington that looks like objectively bad food in general and he still posted it on twitter claiming it was "very, very good", "delicious" even, because he cant even comprehend the depths of his own ignorance. There is no way on gods earth that was "delicious". I don't give a fuck how subjective you think taste is. Edible is probably the kindest description anyone could give it. Even if by some fluke the beef wasnt completely ruined I can taste the bitterness of the burnt pastry just looking at a photo of it and chopped almonds are an incomprehensible addition. The sheer lack of objectivity, and humility and self-reflection from him every single time is mind-boggling.
That describes everything Rick does. Rick can’t conceptualize that other people will look at anything he does and not agree that it’s perfect. It’s why he hates this place so much, Redditors are continually exposing him for the inept retard he is. He can’t LARP as any of the things he pretends to be as long as people are exposing him.
 

chewtoycock

He poisons himself and expects the world to die.
I can't find that particular exchange but he definitely said he was changing the recipe because he doesn't like rare beef. @Caverlock you got it in your autism archives? I can only find these other things that show what a culinary retard he is.View attachment 194632View attachment 194633
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I can understand not liking pâté, but it's an ingredient and part of the whole of a dish, it's not like just eating it on crackers or whatever. For someone who fancies himself a cosmopolitan and open minded, he's a really picky and unadventurous eater. I don't feel like looking back as I type this, is mexican lasagna on the menu?

Also this post was made just so I could say that the first time I bought goose liver pâté I took a couple of bites and didn't really like it, but got stoned and was squeezing it into my mouth straight from the tube like an animal. 7.5/10, would do again.
 

Chive Turkey

Erock Army Deserter
This really is fucking funny. I hope we'll see future additions to the menu like...

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...this Thanksgiving special.

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A variety of chicken and Asian dishes (Lightsaber chopsticks are a must.)

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This curry (?) plated by someone with severe autism...

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...and whatever the fuck kind of slop is going on here.


Need to source that whisky they age in barrels at sea too.
The breaded chicken looks suspiciously alike to one from a shitty Chinese takeaway, no way he made it. I wouldn't trust this dolt to even have the knowhow to bind a sauce with a corn starch slurry.
 

PorqueDealer

Portly Pepperoni Purveyor
I can't find that particular exchange but he definitely said he was changing the recipe because he doesn't like rare beef. @Caverlock you got it in your autism archives? I can only find these other things that show what a culinary retard he is.View attachment 194632View attachment 194633
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"Im far from uncultured"
FILET MINGON (twice he spells it this way so not a typo)
Had no idea drinks are paired with glasses, yes even beers/ales/stouts etc.
Names two swill level beers from a state famous for beer as proof that he knows about this sort of thing.
(fat) rube.
 

JoeCumiawearsDIAPERS

DMANIAC
I’m not a great cook. I cook for myself and I have no concept of flavor profiles or ingredients that bring certain flavors out of other ingredients or how to pair anything. It makes no sense to me and I don’t care to learn. I just cook the shit the way I like it, eat it, then move on. I’m sure if any of it was posted here you guys would kill it and I’d be fine with that.

And that’s the difference. I don’t claim to be a cook. I don’t post it on social media to have internet randos suck me off. I don’t even claim to have good taste in food. Pat thinks he deserves adulation just for cooking something.

Remember when he was in France and ate the eggs (chewing with his mouth open of course) and autistically said he likes scrambled eggs better as he stared with a blank look on his face? He’s a low IQ simpleton. He probably stuffs his fat face like a slob. They should make him eat out of a trough.
 

TorqueWheeler

Dan doesn't have a penis. I. Do.
He is such a fascinating human being.

View attachment 194639
He doesn't like pate and didn't even mention duxelles so it makes me wonder what he even thinks he's supposed to be making.
View attachment 194638
This is some of the closest evidence I can find of him admitting he fucked up ever. He clearly made up his own temperature and cooking times because cooking is easy and he's a special boy who doesn't believe in rare meat but he still wants a pat on the back because he made something that is considered to be a benchmark of high skill so he posted that abomination to the internet and either couldn't see, or just tried to pretend he didnt massively fuck it up. He wants people to think he has the skills and insights to be a cultured renaissance man who is also a creative maverick but he has no real idea what any of those skills are supposed to represent and it is fucking insane how badly that fucks over his credibility. Just incomprehensible self sabotage. He made an objectively bad wellington that looks like objectively bad food in general and he still posted it on twitter claiming it was "very, very good", "delicious" even, because he cant even comprehend the depths of his own ignorance. There is no way on gods earth that was "delicious". I don't give a fuck how subjective you think taste is. Edible is probably the kindest description anyone could give it. Even if by some fluke the beef wasnt completely ruined I can taste the bitterness of the burnt pastry just looking at a photo of it and chopped almonds are an incomprehensible addition. The sheer lack of objectivity, and humility and self-reflection from him every single time is mind-boggling.
He didn't make a duxelle or use any sort of pate, didn't use ham (used bacon instead,) didn't use the right cut of meat, didn't make a sauce to serve it with.... Fat nigga made a meat pie, not a Beef Wellington and still fucked it up. That shit should have slid off the baking tray right into the trash.
 

iblBangedQuasi

Dan Mullen touched my PP at The Galway Pub
I’m not a great cook. I cook for myself and I have no concept of flavor profiles or ingredients that bring certain flavors out of other ingredients or how to pair anything. It makes no sense to me and I don’t care to learn. I just cook the shit the way I like it, eat it, then move on. I’m sure if any of it was posted here you guys would kill it and I’d be fine with that.

And that’s the difference. I don’t claim to be a cook. I don’t post it on social media to have internet randos suck me off. I don’t even claim to have good taste in food. Pat thinks he deserves adulation just for cooking something.

Remember when he was in France and ate the eggs (chewing with his mouth open of course) and autistically said he likes scrambled eggs better as he stared with a blank look on his face? He’s a low IQ simpleton. He probably stuffs his fat face like a slob. They should make him eat out of a trough.
The fact he posted everything he cooked during covid on twitter with his stupid fucking hashtags really solidifies the fact he fancied himself a serious cook and wanted to go viral
 
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