The Abe Vigoda Canadian Thanksgiving Spectacular Megathread

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

I lost my wallet. I'm so sleepy and drunk. Might play the slots for the dopamine.

Yeah, when I lose my money I usually throw the last of my pocket change away and start fresh.

 

[Turk February]

There is nothing more liberating than literally having 0 money in your bank account. You have to become creative. You have to survive. It makes life fun.

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

There is nothing more liberating than literally having 0 money in your bank account. You have to become creative. You have to survive. It makes life fun.

The one time I ever did a dine and dash we were just brainstorming shit we could do for free because none of us had any money. Red Lobster. The waitress was really nice to us and when I said I felt bad we didn't tip her my one buddy was like "That patronizing cunt? With her fake matronly tone? Fuck her."

Then we went to an arcade in a movie theater and my buddy kept crawling under the air hockey table and coming out with a bunch of tokens. That was a fun day.

 

[Dummy Gaynuts]

Red Lobster. The waitress was really nice to us and when I said I felt bad we didn't tip her

If there's one thing Red Lobster waitresses are used to, it's not being tipped

 

[ミスタースパーコル]

Red Slobster

 

[Turk February]

My dine and dash story is super gay. One time I broke up with a girlfriend and I was completely numb. Just not thinking. And I ate some nachos and drank a beer and just walked away without paying because I couldn't think. Sorry, Crabby Joe's

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

My dine and dash story is super gay. One time I broke up with a girlfriend and I was completely numb. Just not thinking. And I ate some nachos and drank a beer and just walked away without paying because I couldn't think. Sorry, Crabby Joe's

Are Crabby Joe's and Shoeless Joe's the exact same thing? Because they seem like the exact same thing.

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

Shoeless Joe's fucking sucks

 

[Turry Fawks]

I was tricked into a dine and dash by my best friend. He ended up getting three cracked ribs and a theft charge out of it. I made it home free and clear and he didn't rat me out.

 

[ミスタースパーコル]

My dine and dash story is super gay. One time I broke up with a girlfriend and I was completely numb. Just not thinking. And I ate some nachos and drank a beer and just walked away without paying because I couldn't think. Sorry, Crabby Joe's

Only times I've ever stole from a store were when nobody including myself is paying attention and I just walk out with items I don't realize I have until I get home.

 

[Turk February]

The Nigerians bass is pounding so hard I have to sync my music with it or it becomes deeply distressing.

 

[Turk February]

Shit. I accidentally ordered 28 tall cans instead of the 12 I wanted. Turk is gunna be fucked up tonight.

 

[Turk February]

Well boys. I'm out of naproxen and antibiotics. Time to die

 

[Turk February]

God damn it I keep listening to the AI remake of my own song and it's so much better than what I originally made. Fuck. Like. Why bother making music when in 30 seconds a computer can make it infinitely better? I get it. I can work with it not against it. But it's disheartening.

 

[Turk February]

Almost 9 am. That means it's lunch time.

 

[Turk February]

Omg that sucks. Why do I keep getting crispy bacon when I have an inflamed throat. It's so fucking dumb.

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

Omg that sucks. Why do I keep getting crispy bacon when I have an inflamed throat. It's so fucking dumb.

I like my bacon all fatty and floppy like a DICK

 

[Turk February]

I like my bacon all fatty and floppy like a DICK

I like my dicks firm and crusty. It's a matter of opinion.

 

[Turry Fawks]

Raw bacon eat pretty good

 

[Turk February]

Raw bacon eat pretty good

"Bacon" winky face. I get what you mean.