Who is more debilitatingly retarded?

[Ashcroft]

Rick and Snackie are perfect lolcows because neither are so mentally ill that it would cause you to feel bad about yourself for picking on a retard. Both have had kids, both have "careers," and both have avid social media followings.
These are not Chris-Chan level tards who require 24-7 care to feed and clean themselves.

However, they both obviously suffer from either personality and/or spectrum disorders which prevent them from building meaningful relationships, continuing their careers, or paying their god damn bills.

Which of these two spergs is the bigger sperg?

 

[Treat Yourself]

It's a tough one man, genuinely. I'd tell you if it wasn't. Snackie held a job for more than half a shift but is dodging the tax man in PR. Rick was able to con all the women in his life into funding his shitty lifestyle and frivolous lawsuits but he wastes it by eating corn dogs and prisoning people on X all day and losing said lawsuits. They're both very fat snakes but I think Rick might be the more maladaptive one.

 

[TorqueWheeler]

Fat Rick is a blithering imbecile and suffers from a variety of severe delusions but Jax seems legitimately like a mental patient. She's absolutely losing her shit on Twitter in ways even Pat would be embarrassed to do right now.

BTW, Fatso, it would be really funny if you replied to her with "Stop responding!" I'm sure that must still niggle you a bit, am I right?

 

[Sputnik]

They are both profoundly stupid and I really wish they would just get the help that they need instead of obsessing over the internet. But alas, here we are. Rick, please just let it go. Your life will improve by leaps and bounds.

 

[Ashcroft]

It's a tough one, man

 

[Steve Ramone]

Without Lynne Pat would be on the street. Jackie managed to get to pr and navigate the courts somewhat. Honestly as soon as Jackie flips on Pat, which IMO is inevitable, she'll ride off into the sunset to her next grift.

 

[hikomow633]

The swarthy fat ape is definitely more malignant and is probably perpetrating serious crimes against other retarded terminally online failures who have committed an imagined slight. Remember, this is the spiteful monkey who, during a drug fueled manic episode, decided to libel a perfectly innocent man living on another continent on account of mistaken identity, and refused to withdraw the allegations upon being proven wrong. They don't care whos lives they ruin.

 

[DominusOdium]

They're both arguably more functional than Nokes

 

[TorpidSloth]

Both are in massive debt, but only Jackie is dumb enough to owe the tax man. Point, Pig.

 

[RealTonySchiavone]

Can someone give me a quick primer on Jackie? I missed this entire era, need to know her backstory

 

[Greygooser]

Can someone give me a quick primer on Jackie? I missed this entire era, need to know her backstory

Self described internet security expert who attached herself to rick’s plight. Constantly wrong. Fat, skin the color of shit

 

[Barney Gumble]

Can someone give me a quick primer on Jackie? I missed this entire era, need to know her backstory

She has massive gorilla hands so big that it's disturbing

 

[TorpidSloth]

Can someone give me a quick primer on Jackie? I missed this entire era, need to know her backstory

She owes 100 grand to the IRS and more to several credit card companies. Hiding out in Puerto Rico. Absent mother. Got impregnated by a high schooler. Massive hands. Definitely has sideburns and probably a mustache

 

[PickleRickle]

Snackie. Rick is just a narcissist with ODD, Jackie is a legit schizophrenic.

 

[Steve Ramone]

Can someone give me a quick primer on Jackie? I missed this entire era, need to know her backstory

Her saga started when she tried to infiltrate the forum, outed her account on twitter by accident posting screenshots, then sperged out here before leaving in shame.

 

[Ashcroft]

It's 20 to 20 right now.

 

[Turk February]

Alright, I'll imagine a few functionality tests and I'll explain my conclusions, these are pure speculation based on what I know of them:

Who would build a better birdhouse?
Tough one, but I think Rick. Jackie strikes me as someone who can no longer work with physical materials and has a history of suing employers for making her do things she doesn't want to do

Who could raise/earn more money in a day?
Both would try using the internet because they're dumb and don't like standing up, and both would be flooded with stlakers. Jackie has less damning shit online, less of a history of stealing charity funds, and a tighter knit community of oppressed schizophrenics. She also knows how to defraud the government for benefits. Point Jackie.

Who would you invite for dinner with friends and family? (ignoring the internet drama story you'd get out of it)
This is tough. Pat seems like a boarish drunk who sees himself as a voice of a cause, would be insufferable after a few minutes, offend everyone at the table by talking down to them. Jackie, even when infuriated can be kind of charming and funny while being an ass, but she's also insane but knows to log off in her crazy periods, I think, cuz I don't believe we've seen the worst of her. On the limited information I have, I have to go with Jackie.

Pat's just more deeply unpleasant and untrustworthy, I guess

 

[Riccardo Bosi]

I voted Rick because Jackie at least understands STOP RESPONDING.

 

[fusciasomething]

Rick recorded himself "vandalising" his own property and then turned it over to a fake journalist which is probably impossible to beat. With Jackie I just rarely have any idea what she's talking about and the dots she tries to connect are legitimately insane. I think they are both incredibly stupid but Jackie seems more unstable which is a great combination

 

[Lamont & Tonelli]

If Pig were a former GNAA member he'd probably still be calling people niggers left and right, not understanding why nobody else (but us) was laughing. Jax's high school transcripts would be funny to see: failed health class because of the smell, but high marks in P.E. because she could palm basketballs.