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POLL: How will Jim's dream marriage end?

How will Jim's marriage end?

  • Murder

    Votes: 18 30.0%
  • Suicide

    Votes: 9 15.0%
  • Murder-suicide

    Votes: 21 35.0%
  • Other

    Votes: 12 20.0%

  • Total voters
    60
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3,155
That’s what I mean, Norton heavily exaggerated how famous he is and Alan thought this would be his chance to be famous. They already did a couple podcasts from Norton’s connections and it’s over and lead to nothing. Now Thor is stuck with some gross short bald man close to 60 who is a bore to be around and im wondering if the Viking has been told to “cool it” with the spending because Norton’s best earning days are behind him.
On yesterday's podcast Thor started the show by lamenting he should've purchased custom furniture and how he didn’t like the shit he himself purchased. Jim was visibly uncomfortable and made a snide remark. This has all the hallmarks of a freshman HS relationship minus the homosexuality and lack of attraction.
 

IGotATreeOnMyHouse85

Stand Alone Fruit
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233,494
His one hobby was getting photos taken with notable people.
When did he ever do something that wasn't for da show or his stand up?
That’s what I mean - any traveling he did was for gigs and he doesn’t have any hobbies or interests (that aren’t degenerate) no gambling, drinking, dresses like a bum, etc. and his autographs are usually photos that have him in it (sports signed memorabilia is one thing that at least could be worth something etc)

Jim satin his apartment when not working and starred at the wall or re-watched the 10 movies he’s seen in his entire life.
 

IGotATreeOnMyHouse85

Stand Alone Fruit
Forum Clout
233,494
On yesterday's podcast Thor started the show by lamenting he should've purchased custom furniture and how he didn’t like the shit he himself purchased. Jim was visibly uncomfortable and made a snide remark. This has all the hallmarks of a freshman HS relationship minus the homosexuality and lack of attraction.
Norton I’m sure has a good amount of money saved up over the years since it’s clear he only spent money on Alan. Artie Lange almost died doing stand up dates while on stern but said he couldn’t leave money on the table and when Norton was on ONA he was working almost every weekend and playing good sized venues. Alan is burning through Norton’s life savings.
 
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^^ This right here tells you everything you need to know about "her" personality. "She" will absolutely get bored with Jimmy just like Stetten did with Anthony. I'm sure it all seems exciting being with a "celebrity" like Jimmy right now but when his already fading star continues to fade further into obscurity and the reality that he's married a 60 year old mollusc who's never going to achieve mainstream success or fame sinks in, Thor will absolutely bounce and take half the worm's money with him.

tl;dr - Suicide (Jimmy's)
Stetten didnt get bored with anthony exactly... i have a feeling she was still into him many years after their break up.

I typed that and realized im gossiping about "celebrity" relationships like a woman. Im gay
 
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51,929
I stand by my original prediction. One night, Jimmy will be "performing" at Uncle Vinnie's Laff Shack on the Jersey Shore, and he will return home to discover that his prostitute he-bride has cleaned the place out, and taken everything he has. And he/she will scribble a note on the back of some junk mail and leave it on the bare counter..."I can't anymore, thank you for everything" with a lipstick kiss on it. No one will ever see him/her again. Then Jimmy will make a bunch of unbearably gay videos about how much "women" suck, and how "girls" always break your heart and etc. And all of his retarded female comic "friends" will go "awww, poor poor little Jimmy", and keep pretending that any of it was actually real.
 
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3,155
I don’t think Alena literally murders Jim but by proxy. Shes not a lash out in violence type but a slow bleed out. She will start with cheating, then divorcing, then taking Jim for everything, and then publicly posting her new relationships and Jim will just off himself
Gay men are deranged. Trannies take gay up to the umpteenth level. You could see Alan's rage today when just bullshitting on a podcast. He's bigger and more powerful and could beat up a billion China men and Hindus on physical prowess alone. I've seen trannies roll drunk small red men on Roosevelt Ave. In Queens. Alan has a big frame, genetic propensity for mortal combat, self-hatred every home has, and despises his husband for uprooting him from a gorgeous Norwegian village to the bowels of NYC under false pretenses. Add in a severe drinking/drug problem and you have a recipe for a muder /suicide.
 
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3,155
I stand by my original prediction. One night, Jimmy will be "performing" at Uncle Vinnie's Laff Shack on the Jersey Shore, and he will return home to discover that his prostitute he-bride has cleaned the place out, and taken everything he has. And he/she will scribble a note on the back of some junk mail and leave it on the bare counter..."I can't anymore, thank you for everything" with a lipstick kiss on it. No one will ever see him/her again. Then Jimmy will make a bunch of unbearably gay videos about how much "women" suck, and how "girls" always break your heart and etc. And all of his retarded female comic "friends" will go "awww, poor poor little Jimmy", and keep pretending that any of it was actually real.
He had his ex on one of his most recent episodes and she was disgusted by the whole situation as all men and women are. If you're scenario plays out Jim kills himself or just keeps on keeping on.
 

DMbA

💢
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11,569
Norton I’m sure has a good amount of money saved up over the years since it’s clear he only spent money on Alan. Artie Lange almost died doing stand up dates while on stern but said he couldn’t leave money on the table and when Norton was on ONA he was working almost every weekend and playing good sized venues. Alan is burning through Norton’s life savings.
He paid Kenny for a decade
 

Lamont & Tonelli

Brevity is... wit.
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54,518
To everyone wondering how Jim falsely inflated his celebrity cred: he was on Leno multiple times. Leno isn't as big an international name as the Rock or Tom Cruise, but surely foreigners interested in American mainstream culture would have heard of him.
 
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To everyone wondering how Jim falsely inflated his celebrity cred: he was on Leno multiple times. Leno isn't as big an international name as the Rock or Tom Cruise, but surely foreigners interested in American mainstream culture would have heard of him.
Appear on Letterman and you can end up dating a doctor. Oh wait, I already am! Gabagool.

joe.jpg
 
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