Fat man gets haircut and is upset his straight "friends" haven't paid their respects

[Harry Powell]

More imaginative sci-fi in this story than in his books

 

[guest]

It’s because he has no straight friends.

Or gay friends either. He's lying

 

[RoTheHo69]

Or gay friends either. He's lying

What about the bowling ball head motherfucker. The penny eating guy?


And I notice his tits all the time? That's not good enough? I'm not a friend?

 

[AntsBatteryCharge]

What about the bowling ball head motherfucker. The penny eating guy?

 

[ThePepsiColaRapist]

Pig, your straight friends didn't notice because they were too busy drinking Miller and being toxic at the strip club/monster truck rally.
One the other hand, your gay friends were watching musicals and Douglas Sirk melodramas, so naturally the subject of your special new haircut came up.

Fuck you, fat man.

Not only are you a liar (you have no friends) but your lies reveal you understand people and basic peer interactions based solely on preexisting tropes and stereotypes.

 

[HotDogJoe]

Every single aspect of this man's existence is contrived. This was written for no other reason than to tell the internet 'I have gay friends'. Which is lie, because he doesn't have any friends, gay or otherwise.

Also - what the fuck sort of 41 year old man is actively looking for their friends to compliment them on a haircut?

Such a fucking weird human being he is.

 

[Raymond]

@CarolMaxheinie Is this an obvious lie? Complimenting someone you don't want to fuck seems like rather female behavior.

Edit: What an unnecessary question. Of course it is.

 

[Ant_It_Fun]

What a needy cunt. I hope he gets creamed by a bus.

 

[ThePepsiColaRapist]

What a needy cunt. I hope he gets creamed by a bus.

Thiki hopes the same happens to her (The Bus is what she calls Tyrone's cock, so I've heard.)

 

[AwfulManTitTankTop]

imagine being a red blooded heterosexual male and getting your haircut and expecting people to notice it like a fucking woman. The only times my buddies, gay and straight, have commented on my hair have been when my haircut looks gay or retarded or both.

If a fag actually complimented Fatricks haircut they absolutely did it in the catty way that a thin woman compliments a fat woman's hair or eyes because neither of those parts of them can get fat. What they're actually saying is "You're a fucking slob, a haircut won't save you from rosacea and obesity and tits and jowls and extra chins and a gut."

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

He has a hat on most of the time and he is sad that nobody said his hair was pretty.

No wonder she left you Pat.

 

[guest]

The fact that this didn't happen aside, it's another example of how stupid liberals can't decide if people that are different should be treated the same or if they need to be treated like an exotic pet or fashion accessory. It's like he has a Bingo card of "others" and is saying "Ooh ooh, this guy takes loads in his ass! Let me announce my connection to him so I can be special too!"

And the false humility with "I could probably be better about it too." I've never seen this egomaniac slob compliment anyone. Like the Bible says "Thou hypocrite, cast out first the beam in thine own eye, and then shalt thou see to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye." And cast out the cheeseburger in thine own mouth while you're at it.

 

[Midian9876]

Pat you don’t have friends.

this is also the most pathetic thing I’ve seen a ‘straight’ male post.

faggot

 

[IGotATreeOnMyHouse85]

Another “this never happened” story to add to the pile. First off, Pat doesn’t have any friends so that’s the first lie, second your “gay friends” don’t care if you get a hair cut since you’re supposed to cut your hair and it’s a common thing. The only time a man (gay or straight) would notice another mans hair cut is if it’s drastic, like going from long hair to short. He’s just trying to look “cool” to twitter but just comes off pathetic and desperate, it’s like he said “I’m an ally, I have black friends!” Which shows he doesn’t look at gay friends as equal. Also nobody would notice a fat 41 year old’s haircut since he doesn’t have much hair anyway and is always wearing a hat. What a loser!

 

[IGotATreeOnMyHouse85]

Every single aspect of this man's existence is contrived. This was written for no other reason than to tell the internet 'I have gay friends'. Which is lie, because he doesn't have any friends, gay or otherwise.

Also - what the fuck sort of 41 year old man is actively looking for their friends to compliment them on a haircut?

Such a fucking weird human being he is.

Because his life is so empty and meaningless getting a haircut is a huge deal. Remember, he’s alone all day on twitter while laying on a couch that doubles as his bed. He doesn’t have a job which means he doesn’t interact with other people, just Internet strangers. Doing any activity in public is an accomplishment, it’s why he takes selfies while doing the most mundane things because when you’re that much of a lazy bum getting a haircut is news in his life. It’s also why he takes photos of his awful cooking because to him it’s a major accomplishment in his empty pathetic life.

 

[Chive Turkey]

What man, gay or straight, gets a haircut and then berates people for not complimenting him on it? Shut up, you old woman.

 

[IGotATreeOnMyHouse85]

This also shows how he feels about himself and gay men. He thinks he’s such a handsome guy that he just can’t STOP his gay friends from giving him compliments and hitting on him. Pat thinks gay guys just spend all day chasing straight men around complimenting them on their handsome boy haircuts which shows he doesn’t have any gay friends. Of course in reality Pat is an fat ugly 41 loser with awful fashion sense and no gay man is complimenting him on his basic super cuts hair style.

 

[FatMarathonCheater]

Did he go to groom for men?

 

[stealthygeek]

The fact that this didn't happen aside, it's another example of how stupid liberals can't decide if people that are different should be treated the same or if they need to be treated like an exotic pet or fashion accessory. It's like he has a Bingo card of "others" and is saying "Ooh ooh, this guy takes loads in his ass! Let me announce my connection to him so I can be special too!"

Reminder: Pat once took a picture of an interracial gay couple that he and Niki were having dinner with to "win" an internet argument. Documenting his interactions with them as if they're so freakish that you need to see it to believe it. He really believes that treating people like this is being open-minded.

 

[guest]

Reminder: Pat once took a picture of an interracial gay couple that he and Niki were having dinner with to "win" an internet argument. Documenting his interactions with them as if they're so freakish that you need to see it to believe it. He really believes that treating people like this is being open-minded.

I'll dig up the pic later but he tweeted something like "I'm at an interracial gay wedding anniversary..." He made the poor homos mug for an awkward picture with Niki just so he could score good boy woke points on Twitter.