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Stuck Watching Standup Shorts on Netflix

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Why are all inlaws so fucking shit?
Dude I sat here one night listening to six of them talk about movies and then they no-shit turned on a channel that was only MOVIE TRAILERS and spent at least half an hour watching it and discussing the movies and the respective cinematic universes they were embedded in.

I'm going to mix another drink immediately.
 

Meownaw

I GOT DA HAT NOW!
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Dude I sat here one night listening to six of them talk about movies and then they no-shit turned on a channel that was only MOVIE TRAILERS and spent at least half an hour watching it and discussing the movies and the respective cinematic universes they were embedded in.

I'm going to mix another drink immediately.
That sounds horrendous.
 
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Consider popping in one of your copies of Demented World to a nearby CD player stereo and try to drown out the sound of the TV. This will establish you as patriarch of the family and introduce your family to the comedy stylings of Opie & Anthony.
It's late enough to slink away now. Aziz Ansari is currently bashing the much more successful Ice Cube about not wanting to take the kike spike. I wish somebody would drop a grader on his head.
 
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Don't be a pussy, Terry.

You sit there and you think about that near senior citizen riding a gigantic vibrating dildo angrily...if you're into racial stuff like Nana you can imagine that it is black
No, you can't make me. Years of being molested by Jews has trained me to clamp down on unpleasant thoughts within milliseconds.
 

gassers

CakeHorn/Say "Cookie"/BonnieMcFarlaneMe2 Alt
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This showed up in my feed.
 
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Every time someone shows me stand up I really try to contain my autism, but I sit there and get genuinely angry thinking "you don't know fucking shit."

Bitches really love Nikki Glazer.
I was deeply offended by the whole thing. All of the women were true to type "muh vagina, muh period, I look like a dyke" SHUT THE FUCK UP.

I'm heatin up again.
 
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