HE'S GOT THE FAT VAXX FEVER BUN-NAH-NAAAAHHHHHH

[AwfulManTitTankTop]

Imagine that, a 41 year old obese man and chronic alcoholic not feeling well. Surely it must be COVID!

Don't be alarmed, though. Ted Nougat doesn't have the ching chong chills. He just feels the way a man who abuses his body to a horrific extent should feel.

 

[CarolMaxheinie]

Dear Mr. Tomlinson,

This is Dr. Forums with the results of your rapid test:

“I dunno….FAT”

Good day, lard one.

 

[IGotATreeOnMyHouse85]

A 41 year old fat loser wants the Internet know he has the sniffles. He has the most empty life since this is all so Internet strangers can tell him “feel better!”

 

[Mr-Wrinkle-Paws]

How could he catch a breakthrough case with his fat ass parked on the couch 24/7

 

[FranksWirecutters]

How could he catch a breakthrough case with his fat ass parked on the couch 24/7

Black people spend a lot of time as his house and they have the lowest vaxx numbers.

 

[stealthygeek]

He 100% considered the Twitter ramifications if he had been one of those breakthrough cases. The Expert/Victim angle would had him really dialing up the cuntiness.

 

[TokenX]

It's probably just a cold, Fat. Remember those?

 

[Covid19]

Probably caught it at the Foo Fighters concert.

 

[RobertMewler]

Nice superspreading, stupid.

 

[based and white pilled]

Already had his excuse prepared if a positive test challenged his belief system.

-Damian

 

[Brooke Shields]

This is why we can't have universal healthcare
every unemployed fatrick who gets hotflashes will flood up the ER, and america's got a lot of fatricks

 

[Gay Faggot.]

Thought you were an actual tough guy, who would spoon feed me my teeth? I thought you could chase me for miles and tie me in a bow or some shit? A cold made you change your day plans (sitting on the couch tweeting and farting) and go to the doctors? Thought actual tough guys didn’t go to the doctor because they thought it made them look weak? The fuck ever happened to Gary Cooper? Fat faggot.

 

[AwfulManTitTankTop]

He 100% considered the Twitter ramifications if he had been one of those breakthrough cases. The Expert/Victim angle would had him really dialing up the cuntiness.

Yes, child, I am a breakthrough case and no, child, this does not delegitimize the vaccine in any way.

And he'd definitely have a pinned tweet being like "Despite being a breakthrough case I would never regret getting vaccinated because getting vaccinated is the only way we're gonna save the world." And it'd be met with a tepid response which would set him off on his honey child shit.

 

[Mr-Wrinkle-Paws]

He's having meatloaf withdrawals

 

[Getoffmylawn2]

Knowing how much he lies, I wouldn't be surprised if he actually has COVID but won't admit it.

And if he isn't lying, it can take a few days before someone tests positive. When I had it my first test came back negative, and then my second a few days later came back positive.

 

[Tony2Shirts_mybb]

any real man would suck it up. only a women would run to the er for a covid test, what a pussy this guy is.

but anyway its safe to say he 100% has covid from
the foo fighters concert. the irony makes me think god is real.

 

[IGotATreeOnMyHouse85]

any real man would suck it up. only a women would run to the er for a covid test, what a pussy this guy is.

but anyway its safe to say he 100% has covid from
the foo fighters concert. the irony makes me think god is real.

He’s like a senior citizen who will go to the doctor just because they want someone to talk to. Being unemployed for a decade will do that to a fat loser.

 

[Easily_Remembered]

Huh. It's odd that a middle aged, morbidly overweight, alcoholic, almost completely inactive person who spends almost every waking hour staring at a small screen or raging over things that have absolutely nothing to do with him should be feeling ill, especially in between shoveling forks full of greasy, fried bar food into his fish mouth.

Sometimes there's just no justice in the world. Surely it must be the fault of the anti-vaxxers that this portrait of peak performance and masculinity isn't feeling 100%.

 

[Meownaw]

Knowing how much he lies, I wouldn't be surprised if he actually has COVID but won't admit it.

And if he isn't lying, it can take a few days before someone tests positive. When I had it my first test came back negative, and then my second a few days later came back positive.

The implications of this have me rock hard.

 

[Harry Powell]

If he is hospitalized I’ll send him flowers every day; hopefully knowing his fans are thinking of him will bring him some comfort