Everything the body needs

[TokenX]

 

[Coonskin]

Patrick took the fat pill

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

My buddy was talking about bear bait barrels the other day and the while time in my head I was thinking "Pat would absolutely fucking love that." It's like peanut butter, these feed pellets that smell really good to substitute for his corn, coffee grounds, blueberries, honey, dog food and donuts. Put a little pile of raw spinach on that and you've got a Pat's breakfast.

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

 

[HotDogJoe]

You can tell he's retarded just by how he spread the peanut butter on the toast. It's like he shoved his paw in the jar and just smeared it on; no knife involved.

 

[CarolMaxheinie]

I wish I could claim that I coined the phrase “pants-shitting retard”, but my attorney did that when I apprised him of my upcoming life sentence for calling a “pundit” fat on the internet and pointing out his dubious fun run results. He said “You have a lot to lose. Why are you teasing this pants-shitting retard?”

Then I showed him Pat’s Twitter and he understood. He still said the guy is legitimately retarded and I should just let him “drool into his little sandbox”.

 

[guest]

You can tell he's retarded just by how he spread the peanut butter on the toast. It's like he shoved his paw in the jar and just smeared it on; no knife involved.

I showed my wife that and said it looks like a gorilla spread that with its paw.

 

[guest]

I wish I could claim that I coined the phrase “pants-shitting retard”, but my attorney did that when I apprised him of my upcoming life sentence for calling a “pundit” fat on the internet and pointing out his dubious fun run results. He said “You have a lot to lose. Why are you teasing this pants-shitting retard?”

Then I showed him Pat’s Twitter and he understood. He still said the guy is legitimately retarded and I should just let him “drool into his little sandbox”.

Because it's like smoking crack to us, I literally get a high on court dates lol.